It is hard to be a happy person when you are not. You ask any naturally happy person how that stay so optimistic and they will tell you about how easy it is and how everyone can be just as blah blah blah....sunshine....rainbows...blah blah. It's not that easy. When you have to wake up for school every day at 5:45, you begin to harbor a slight amount of resentment. I usually begin the year with a proper amount of friendliness, fresh off of summer vacation, but, by the end of the long, overstretched school year, my ability to feel anything has been depleted. I no longer care who gets hit in the hallway with my backpack or who is below me when I drop eggs down the stairway (that one might be a bit extreme, but you catch my drift).
So, here is SlimShaney's guide on how to be happy:
Step one: Take time to enjoy yourself. Sure, you may have an extremely long essay due tomorrow, but take that extra time to watch YouTube videos and check for friend requests. Have last week's Glee taped? Go ahead, watch it. It was good.
Step Two: Don't smile if you don't have to. If someone smiles at you and you have no genuine happy feeling, don't smile back. Now, if they smile, stick their hand in their armpit, and make farting noises, go ahead and smile....because that's funny!
Step Three: Don't talk to acquaintances. If you met someone once, at a party you were only at for ten minutes, don't strike up a conversation. It will be much better if you merely sit there in awkward silence. Remember, an awkward silence a day keeps potential friends away!
Step Four: Eat a lot. I find that I am most happy when I am scarfing down some Pringles or chugging a Pepsi.
Step Five: Don't eat too much. You know that feeling you get when you just ate too much at Ruby Tuesday and it feels like your stomach might explode? Yeah...that is not fun. And finally....
Step Six: Ignore this list. This is the way that I make myself feel happy. We all have different things that make us joyful. You simply have to find those things and hold on to them. For me, that main thing is friends and family that I can rely on and trust no matter what....oh yeah.....and food. :)
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Ohhh hey.......yooouuuu.....
While I was working today, a man came through my line. I had been somewhat rushing through the last few orders so I did not look up when I said, "How are you today?" He said that he was good and I continued scanning his groceries. Halfway through his order, he asked me, "Hey, did you go to (Insert the name of my elementary school here)?" I looked up. I had not thought about elementary school since middle school when I longed for the days of recess and snack time. "Yes I did." I said. "Well," he responded, "I used to be an administrator there. I'm Mr. (Insert difficult to pronounce name here) and I remember you." Crap. I didn't remember him at all. I stood there for about five seconds with a somewhat blank expression on my face and then I figured I should just tell him the truth. I said, "Ohhhh yeah! I remember you, too! That's so weird! It's been a while! A long, long time...." He continued to ask me questions about what grade I was in and what kind of activities I had gotten involved in and the only thing that I could think of to ask was, "Would you like your Dr. Pepper left out?" It was awkward.
Let me clarify something so that I don't seem like a huge jerk. I went to two different elementary schools. The school that Mr. Whatshisface was an administrator at was my first school that I went to when I moved here during kindergarten. The second school was built during my second grade year and by third grade I had been transferred. So, I would have only had this administrator for three years! This was also during a time that no one can remember! I don't even remember what my kindergarten teacher looks like! (I'm going to stop this paragraph now because it just makes me sound worse).
By sharing this story, my question is: should I be responsible for remembering him? People forget others all the time, so why do I feel so bad that I didn't remember him at all. Seriously, his face was like a blank canvass, but my mind was looking for things that made it memorable. I've met a lot of people in my life, we all have, so why should I punish myself for not remembering this man? Still, I can't escape the feeling that I should remember him. He didn't have a name tag on that said "Hi my name is Mr. Idontcare," but I still feel bad for not remembering him.
Let me clarify something so that I don't seem like a huge jerk. I went to two different elementary schools. The school that Mr. Whatshisface was an administrator at was my first school that I went to when I moved here during kindergarten. The second school was built during my second grade year and by third grade I had been transferred. So, I would have only had this administrator for three years! This was also during a time that no one can remember! I don't even remember what my kindergarten teacher looks like! (I'm going to stop this paragraph now because it just makes me sound worse).
By sharing this story, my question is: should I be responsible for remembering him? People forget others all the time, so why do I feel so bad that I didn't remember him at all. Seriously, his face was like a blank canvass, but my mind was looking for things that made it memorable. I've met a lot of people in my life, we all have, so why should I punish myself for not remembering this man? Still, I can't escape the feeling that I should remember him. He didn't have a name tag on that said "Hi my name is Mr. Idontcare," but I still feel bad for not remembering him.
Just Keep Singing....Just Keep Singing.....
I am getting really nervous. All-State auditions are this coming weekend which means that my life will be consumed for the next week. Instead of having regular choir, we will be practicing with only All-State quartets. Instead of having a life after school, I will be practicing...a lot. Also, instead of being completely stress free, I will be a wreck. A big, fat, nasty wreck that no one can avoid.
We have been practicing this music now for around two months and I realize that I should probably feel ready, but I simply don't. Our group hasn't practiced enough...I haven't practiced enough! The other day we had a workshop with a woman who does vocal lessons for the all-state music. Out of my four-person quartet, I was the one who received the most criticism. "Slim, try not to sing so gruff." "Slim, try to stop singing around the pitch." "Slim, eye contact!" It was embarrassing! Hear I have been for the last two months singing this music and this lady notices all of the things I am doing wrong in one hour. It made me feel so bad about myself. Still, I can make the best of this. She may think I am a terrible singer, but if I practice as much as possible and focus on the things she pointed out, I can (maybe) make All-State!
Singing is hard. I feel like a lot of people do not realize that. There are so many different things that you need to think about and implement into your performance. Are you using the right vowel shape? Is your tone too bright? Are you standing up straight? If I wanted to stand up straight, I would have joined Manners Club (that would be kind of hilarious if that actually existed). I honestly did not know that by signing up to do All-State, I would bringing this much stress upon myself. Sure, I have learned a lot, but what if, in the end, I do not make it? Was all of my hard work for nothing? Honestly, I don't really care that much. If I do not make it, I do not make it. There's always next year. But if I do not make it next year, you better move aside because this train wreck is taking everyone down with it....just kidding.
We have been practicing this music now for around two months and I realize that I should probably feel ready, but I simply don't. Our group hasn't practiced enough...I haven't practiced enough! The other day we had a workshop with a woman who does vocal lessons for the all-state music. Out of my four-person quartet, I was the one who received the most criticism. "Slim, try not to sing so gruff." "Slim, try to stop singing around the pitch." "Slim, eye contact!" It was embarrassing! Hear I have been for the last two months singing this music and this lady notices all of the things I am doing wrong in one hour. It made me feel so bad about myself. Still, I can make the best of this. She may think I am a terrible singer, but if I practice as much as possible and focus on the things she pointed out, I can (maybe) make All-State!
Singing is hard. I feel like a lot of people do not realize that. There are so many different things that you need to think about and implement into your performance. Are you using the right vowel shape? Is your tone too bright? Are you standing up straight? If I wanted to stand up straight, I would have joined Manners Club (that would be kind of hilarious if that actually existed). I honestly did not know that by signing up to do All-State, I would bringing this much stress upon myself. Sure, I have learned a lot, but what if, in the end, I do not make it? Was all of my hard work for nothing? Honestly, I don't really care that much. If I do not make it, I do not make it. There's always next year. But if I do not make it next year, you better move aside because this train wreck is taking everyone down with it....just kidding.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Workin Hard for the Money
I decided that, since I had musical practice this entire week, that I would ask off for work the entire week. Well, apparently, I missed several different sales that I will now not be prepared for in the future. Jeesh. You take a week off and suddenly they think that you have moved to Africa and adopted your own family. Nope. Sorry, but if I were to move away and start a family, it would somewhere far away from where Freddy's would ever find me. I asked off for the week because i was busy, not because I didn't want to work (although that may have been in the back of my mind).
Another thing is that I have noticed that my wallet emptied much quicker when I had not worked this week. I have more free time to spend money on things like Monopoly at McDonalds, or porcelain dog figurines, or a paintball gun (all are extremely useful in a time of personal distress). I do not think that I ever noticed what a change work has had on my money supply. Mostly, it just goes into my account and I rarely check up on it, but, now, while it is slowly dwindling away, I am beginning to get worried. Should I be working more? Should I spend less? Will I ever have enough money for college, but then again, who does?
I just do not understand why they would be angry with me for asking off for a week. I know several people who have called in sick when they really are not, so could I just do that? Is it better to promise that I will work and then duck out at the last second or give them a real reason for not being available and have them be prepared? I think that is a pretty easy question (especially with my subtle phrasing).
Also, here's the thing: I asked off for this week and I left pretty much all of next week open and they scheduled me for one five hour shift. It seems to me that if Freddy's wants me to be more involved, they should be giving me more hours! And how am I supposed to make all my money if I don't get any hours?! And how will I possible play McDonalds Monopoly without any money?!?!
Another thing is that I have noticed that my wallet emptied much quicker when I had not worked this week. I have more free time to spend money on things like Monopoly at McDonalds, or porcelain dog figurines, or a paintball gun (all are extremely useful in a time of personal distress). I do not think that I ever noticed what a change work has had on my money supply. Mostly, it just goes into my account and I rarely check up on it, but, now, while it is slowly dwindling away, I am beginning to get worried. Should I be working more? Should I spend less? Will I ever have enough money for college, but then again, who does?
I just do not understand why they would be angry with me for asking off for a week. I know several people who have called in sick when they really are not, so could I just do that? Is it better to promise that I will work and then duck out at the last second or give them a real reason for not being available and have them be prepared? I think that is a pretty easy question (especially with my subtle phrasing).
Also, here's the thing: I asked off for this week and I left pretty much all of next week open and they scheduled me for one five hour shift. It seems to me that if Freddy's wants me to be more involved, they should be giving me more hours! And how am I supposed to make all my money if I don't get any hours?! And how will I possible play McDonalds Monopoly without any money?!?!
It's Not Over Till SlimShaney Sings...
Remember that blog I made last week about the musical I am in, The Fantasticks? Well, the run of it was this weekend. I have to say, I actually enjoyed this one. My part was perfect for me. I was an overenthusiastic, old actor who wants everyone to know who he is. I got very positive feedback about my role from both the audience laughter and comments after the show. In the end, I was very proud of the entire cast, crew, and directors.
Not only did I do well, and trust me, I did pretty well (I am just kidding about the cocky attitude, by the way), but the entire show was very well done. The two fathers did excellent and were cast well in the parts given to them. The girl, Luisa, has a very beautiful voice and has incredible acting potential. Matt, the boy, is also a talented singer and can do back flips! How cool is that?! The Mute may not have any lines, but her facial expressions are so priceless that I can't look at her without laughing. Finally, the kid who plays El Gallo, the narrator, is a great actor and singer who really does a wonderful job of bringing the whole show together and taking us on a "fantastick" journey.
The next stop in the road: we take it to the thespian festival I was talking about earlier. It will be difficult. We have to change the entire set so that it fits a different type of stage than the one that we used. This means that the show will have to be re-blocked and teched again. It was hard enough the first time. The fact that the play is still performing also means more rehearsal. The director has given us this next week off, but once we get back to practice, he will be roaring to go. I imagine more yelling and cursing than the first time.
Also, in order to pay for the cost of this festival, the director has asked us to fundraise these coupon books. I am fundraised out! Some people do not understand how difficult it is to get people to buy the things you are selling. No matter how great you think the deal is, it might not be to them. Still, despite the extra hassle it may lay on me, I am excited to be performing at this festival. It sounds like a great opportunity to showcase the show and MY incredible talent (again, just kidding).
Not only did I do well, and trust me, I did pretty well (I am just kidding about the cocky attitude, by the way), but the entire show was very well done. The two fathers did excellent and were cast well in the parts given to them. The girl, Luisa, has a very beautiful voice and has incredible acting potential. Matt, the boy, is also a talented singer and can do back flips! How cool is that?! The Mute may not have any lines, but her facial expressions are so priceless that I can't look at her without laughing. Finally, the kid who plays El Gallo, the narrator, is a great actor and singer who really does a wonderful job of bringing the whole show together and taking us on a "fantastick" journey.
The next stop in the road: we take it to the thespian festival I was talking about earlier. It will be difficult. We have to change the entire set so that it fits a different type of stage than the one that we used. This means that the show will have to be re-blocked and teched again. It was hard enough the first time. The fact that the play is still performing also means more rehearsal. The director has given us this next week off, but once we get back to practice, he will be roaring to go. I imagine more yelling and cursing than the first time.
Also, in order to pay for the cost of this festival, the director has asked us to fundraise these coupon books. I am fundraised out! Some people do not understand how difficult it is to get people to buy the things you are selling. No matter how great you think the deal is, it might not be to them. Still, despite the extra hassle it may lay on me, I am excited to be performing at this festival. It sounds like a great opportunity to showcase the show and MY incredible talent (again, just kidding).
All By Ourselves...
Recently, one of the beloved vocal teachers at my school passed away from a battle with cancer. To honor his memory, his wife put together a beautiful service that would acknowledge how much he has affected the vocal community. My choir, having several people that learned directly under this teacher, was asked to sing at the event. So, for the last few weeks, we have been preparing several songs (I even got a solo...one where I am supposed to sound like a dying bird....but still). On Friday, we got our tuxedos, dresses, and directions and left class fully prepared for the reception.
In an unforeseen twist of fate, our director suffered, this weekend, from severe kidney stones that eventually landed him in the hospital. Of course, he was unable to attend the concert. Still, we have two directors so it was not an entirely huge deal, except for the fact that the other director was moving into a new house that day. Later that afternoon, everyone received a panicked text message from one of our choir's members relaying the news. She told us that we should still come at the proper time and if we could not conduct ourselves, we should not perform.
At 2:30, our expected call time, the whole group was gathered and you could feel the tension in the air. We went on stage to rehearse and no one was really sure what to do. Luckily, a nice man offered to play pitches for us and the girl who had sent out the message counted us in and helped maintain tempo. It was not a train wreck. I had been expecting complete disaster, but, instead, we were actually pretty good! After running through all of our songs, we went and got changed. Now, here was the big question: could we perform the same way with a large crowd of people watching? We did. It was weird. If anything, I think that we had looked more impressive because of the fact that we had no director.
This entire situation makes me think of the old saying, "the show must go on." We had a large number of things work against us, but we persevered on and actually sang pretty well. I am very proud of our choir for having the guts to stand in front of a group of people with no director. I highly doubt that any sports team would do nearly as well without their coach...
In an unforeseen twist of fate, our director suffered, this weekend, from severe kidney stones that eventually landed him in the hospital. Of course, he was unable to attend the concert. Still, we have two directors so it was not an entirely huge deal, except for the fact that the other director was moving into a new house that day. Later that afternoon, everyone received a panicked text message from one of our choir's members relaying the news. She told us that we should still come at the proper time and if we could not conduct ourselves, we should not perform.
At 2:30, our expected call time, the whole group was gathered and you could feel the tension in the air. We went on stage to rehearse and no one was really sure what to do. Luckily, a nice man offered to play pitches for us and the girl who had sent out the message counted us in and helped maintain tempo. It was not a train wreck. I had been expecting complete disaster, but, instead, we were actually pretty good! After running through all of our songs, we went and got changed. Now, here was the big question: could we perform the same way with a large crowd of people watching? We did. It was weird. If anything, I think that we had looked more impressive because of the fact that we had no director.
This entire situation makes me think of the old saying, "the show must go on." We had a large number of things work against us, but we persevered on and actually sang pretty well. I am very proud of our choir for having the guts to stand in front of a group of people with no director. I highly doubt that any sports team would do nearly as well without their coach...
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Cold Stone's Newest Creation: Funeral Cake Remix
Don't jump to conclusions. I remember when I was getting checker trained at Freddy's, the lady who was teaching us (we will call her Monica) told us a story about back when she was a cashier. She was around 25 years old and a man and his son came through the line. They put their groceries on the line and waited for Monica to scan them. Halfway through the line was a cake. She scanned it and then asked, "Oh! Whose birthday is it?" The man gently smiled and said, "It's actually for my wife's funeral."
Woah. Well.....now I am afraid to ask about cakes. Today, I had someone come through my line and they had a cake that said: "Happy Birthday, Jimmy!" The parents were buying candy/ party favors, looked very happy, and even called one of their kids Jimmy, but I still avoided asking about the cake. What if they had said something like, "Jimmy passed away several months ago, but we still like to believe he's here."? How bad would I have felt then??
It's gotten to the point where I do not ask about certain objects because I associate them with different situations. Streamers: funeral. Candy: funeral. Big balloon that says "Congratulations, Scott!": funeral. It's getting to be unhealthy. On the other hand, though, I do associate some things with positive situations. Ice cream: Cold Stone. Peanut butter: Cold Stone. Canned asparagus: Cold Stone. I guess that is kind of unhealthy also....
The lesson of not jumping to conclusions applies not only to cakes (surprisingly), but also to real life! You see a man walking down a street at night with dark sunglasses and a cane that he keeps sticking out in front of him, don't assume he is blind. If your mother doesn't hear you say that you refuse to clean your room, don't assume that she is deaf (she might also be crazy). I wish that I had examples that did not apply to disabilities, but they seem to be evading me at the current moment.
Don't judge a book by its cover. Open the book and read the inside cover. Then, if it's a really long description move to the back, inside cover. If the book is paperback, probably just look on the back cover and you might find something. Open up to a page. Read the page. Don't open up to a page at the end of the book, though; it might give away the ending. Try reading the first page to see what kind of vibe the-. Actually, that's too much work. Who needs books anyway?
Woah. Well.....now I am afraid to ask about cakes. Today, I had someone come through my line and they had a cake that said: "Happy Birthday, Jimmy!" The parents were buying candy/ party favors, looked very happy, and even called one of their kids Jimmy, but I still avoided asking about the cake. What if they had said something like, "Jimmy passed away several months ago, but we still like to believe he's here."? How bad would I have felt then??
It's gotten to the point where I do not ask about certain objects because I associate them with different situations. Streamers: funeral. Candy: funeral. Big balloon that says "Congratulations, Scott!": funeral. It's getting to be unhealthy. On the other hand, though, I do associate some things with positive situations. Ice cream: Cold Stone. Peanut butter: Cold Stone. Canned asparagus: Cold Stone. I guess that is kind of unhealthy also....
The lesson of not jumping to conclusions applies not only to cakes (surprisingly), but also to real life! You see a man walking down a street at night with dark sunglasses and a cane that he keeps sticking out in front of him, don't assume he is blind. If your mother doesn't hear you say that you refuse to clean your room, don't assume that she is deaf (she might also be crazy). I wish that I had examples that did not apply to disabilities, but they seem to be evading me at the current moment.
Don't judge a book by its cover. Open the book and read the inside cover. Then, if it's a really long description move to the back, inside cover. If the book is paperback, probably just look on the back cover and you might find something. Open up to a page. Read the page. Don't open up to a page at the end of the book, though; it might give away the ending. Try reading the first page to see what kind of vibe the-. Actually, that's too much work. Who needs books anyway?
Do-Nut Get Me Angry
I would like to talk about making payment...to me. Today, while I was working at Freddy's, some guy came up to me and bought a couple donuts that added up to about two dollars and fifty cents. The man digs through his wallet and I see that he has two one dollar bills and a bunch of change (I'm talking wealthy homeless person change), so I get ready to take his money. He hands me a fifty. I must have looked at that bill for twenty seconds. Why was he using a fifty? I did not understand why he didn't just sift through his change and give that to me! In an attempt to get him to reopen his wallet, I explained to him that fifties needed to be checked by a manager and that we would have to wait for them to get there. "Alright," he said.
So, I called the manager. Unfortunately, at that moment, he was busy with another cashier which meant we would have to wait. I do not know if you have ever had to experience the awkwardness of waiting to see if your fifty is counterfeit, but it is not fun. It's like waiting at the dentist or in the bathroom stall until someone leaves. I tried making polite conversation by saying, "So, is it still nice outside?" He said, "Yes." So much for that idea.
Here's the thing that really annoys me: when the manager took his sweet little time getting over to my register, the customer got mad at me. "I don't understand why you can't just check it yourself! What is taking so long? I am not coming back here!"..........Here is what I would have said:
"Oh, wow, I am really sorry that it is taking so long to get this fifty checked. You know, the fifty you used to pay for THREE donuts? Maybe you should have just gotten one donut and paid with a hundred! That way your shopping experience would be even worse! Because that's all I care about RIGHT?! Making you miserable!! 'Cause that seems to be all you care about doing to ME!!! Here!!! Take you stupid donuts!! I'll pay for them myself!! With EXACT CHANGE!!!!"
Here's what I said: "I'm sorry, sir." And the awkward silence continued.
So, I called the manager. Unfortunately, at that moment, he was busy with another cashier which meant we would have to wait. I do not know if you have ever had to experience the awkwardness of waiting to see if your fifty is counterfeit, but it is not fun. It's like waiting at the dentist or in the bathroom stall until someone leaves. I tried making polite conversation by saying, "So, is it still nice outside?" He said, "Yes." So much for that idea.
Here's the thing that really annoys me: when the manager took his sweet little time getting over to my register, the customer got mad at me. "I don't understand why you can't just check it yourself! What is taking so long? I am not coming back here!"..........Here is what I would have said:
"Oh, wow, I am really sorry that it is taking so long to get this fifty checked. You know, the fifty you used to pay for THREE donuts? Maybe you should have just gotten one donut and paid with a hundred! That way your shopping experience would be even worse! Because that's all I care about RIGHT?! Making you miserable!! 'Cause that seems to be all you care about doing to ME!!! Here!!! Take you stupid donuts!! I'll pay for them myself!! With EXACT CHANGE!!!!"
Here's what I said: "I'm sorry, sir." And the awkward silence continued.
I Can't Believe It's Not Broadway
For the fall musical, this year, our school is doing The Fantasticks. If you were to ask me what it is about, I would tell you that a small branch goes on a "fantastick" journey to become the stick he has always wanted to be. I know...heartwarming, isn't it? Truthfully, describing the show would take way longer than I want to take, so just imagine Romeo and Juliet with a series of uncomfortable vegetable references. My character's name is Henry. He is a struggling, old actor who finds himself being hired to "abduct" Luisa (Juliet). Henry over exaggerates to the extreme and becomes thrilled quite easily. I like to pretend that Henry is a mixture between Gollum/Smeagol from Lord of the Rings, Frank from Everybody Loves Raymond, and King Arthur.
We have been practicing since August, now, and it is getting to be a bit tiresome. Thankfully, next weekend is when the show goes up and all of our hard work will be on display. This also means that this week means a constant stream of verbal abuse from our director, some sort of flu outbreak, and a crazy diva moment from an unsuspected person. It always happens. Always.
One of the exciting things about this show is that we are taking to a state-wide festival celebrating theatre. That means we get to perform it for thousands of scrutinizing eyes who will tell us we did a great job, give us a secret thespian handshake, and then tell their friends how much better they could have done. It might also mean that I will have to act friendly like I do at Freddy's. I sense that I will have to say, "Were you in the musical? You did such a good job!," or, "I really liked your take on that scene!," and finally, "Wow! You have so much talent!" In all actuality, I will be thinking, "That musical was so bad. It felt like someone was trying to shove giants raisins down my ears," or, "Seriously? I don't think Juliet would be twirling her hair if she had just found out Romeo died," and finally, "Wow! You have so much talent! You should be a hypnotist or a mattress salesman because I am now asleep." I know it's harsh, but still.
It feels like this show has gone by much quicker than it has. The director actually cast the show in June and we were expected to memorize over the summer. Still, I feel like the show is very impressive and that others will enjoy it...and I am not just saying that.
We have been practicing since August, now, and it is getting to be a bit tiresome. Thankfully, next weekend is when the show goes up and all of our hard work will be on display. This also means that this week means a constant stream of verbal abuse from our director, some sort of flu outbreak, and a crazy diva moment from an unsuspected person. It always happens. Always.
One of the exciting things about this show is that we are taking to a state-wide festival celebrating theatre. That means we get to perform it for thousands of scrutinizing eyes who will tell us we did a great job, give us a secret thespian handshake, and then tell their friends how much better they could have done. It might also mean that I will have to act friendly like I do at Freddy's. I sense that I will have to say, "Were you in the musical? You did such a good job!," or, "I really liked your take on that scene!," and finally, "Wow! You have so much talent!" In all actuality, I will be thinking, "That musical was so bad. It felt like someone was trying to shove giants raisins down my ears," or, "Seriously? I don't think Juliet would be twirling her hair if she had just found out Romeo died," and finally, "Wow! You have so much talent! You should be a hypnotist or a mattress salesman because I am now asleep." I know it's harsh, but still.
It feels like this show has gone by much quicker than it has. The director actually cast the show in June and we were expected to memorize over the summer. Still, I feel like the show is very impressive and that others will enjoy it...and I am not just saying that.
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